Author: Lillyval
Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2011 8:44 am
Hi boomer. I identify with your post. While I have done some therapy, NA groups, and work on my addiction, I still do exhibit some of the addict behaviors you described. I do get a little lift from my Sub, not so much a buzz but more energy, so I do often time my taking it to just before an important or difficult event. My doc is also the type who just hands me the prescription and doesn’t require anything. And, yes, I have run out of Sub early.
I think it’s interesting that you still "feel" your Subs after 5 years. I really felt it the first few months, and now that I’m coming up on 2 years it’s almost imperceptable. I think once you have been on Sub for a couple of years your body pretty much acclimates to it, and the length of time you’ve been on it doesnt play into how hard it will be getting off. I think whether it’s been 2 years or 10 you’re probably going to want to do a long, slow taper.
To stay on or go off only you can decide. I agree with Hat, if you’re still doing the old addict behaviors, there’s nothing to stop you from going right back to pills when you go off. I recently decided to start tapering off Sub, and I made a commitment to myself to work on my recovery while I am doing it, because I spent most of my time on Sub just floating along. Just the fact that you’re questioning where you are is a start. Keep talking to people on the forum, and you will get a lot of information and ideas.
Take care,
Lilly
