Author: Romeo
Posted: Sat Jul 16, 2011 11:40 am
Hi dotto1,
I’ve been a member of this site for almost a year now and I have finally come across a post where someone’s withdrawal experience mirrors mine. Most everything you said is what I went through, except for meeting God……during my wd, it felt like God had completely left me. I begged and begged for His help, but it was like He was nowhere to be found. I know now that He was there the whole time, but He knew that I had to be broken completely if I were to have a chance at staying off of drugs so He allowed Satan to have his way with me for weeks on end.
I detoxed off of Suboxone, I wasn’t detoxing off of alcohol or benzo’s too. My wd was all from Suboxone. I need to mention that I was not found unresponsive in the shower either…..I never did get taken to the hospital.
Anyway, I know this……my wd experience from Suboxone was inhumane, it was brutal, it was life changing and FOR ME and ME alone, it was exactly what I needed to get my ass "clean" and to stay clean. I have been hanging around this site trying to help encourage others to taper whenever possible because I believe that is the route that will provide them with as little wd as possible, but some of us refuse to taper and I think that’s fine……it’s what we needed to do to get to where we’re at.
BTW, I jumped off of 5mg of Suboxone, but what I don’t ever tell people is that the week leading up to my jump I was at 8mg and the week prior to that I was at 12mg……so who knows how much Suboxone I actaully had in in my system?? I was on Suboxone for 3 years, I was on Hydrocodone and OxyContin for 10 years prior to getting onto Suboxone. Yeah, I was one fucked up little camper.
Listen, today puts me at 1 year, 1 month and 12 days off of Suboxone. I’m here to tell you to keep going, you’re gonna feel crappy for a good while, but you’ve got a solid 6 weeks under your belt and you’re doing great!!! It gets better man, it honestly gets better, I promise!!
That old saying about getting "clean" is the easy part, staying "clean" is the hard part. Well, getting clean wasn’t fucking easy for me, staying clean isn’t a walk in the park though…..staying clean takes constant attention. Don’t let your guard down or it will come back and bite you. I got bit around the 10 month mark and again around 11 months, mercifully, both slip ups were short lived. I actually have this forum and MANY of the members to thank for keeping my slip ups short.
Good luck and I hope you stick around.
